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A short story and a question.
The story:
A young son was building a wall for a structure on his family's property. It consisted of over a thousand bricks, but the first row had four crooked bricks that could not be fixed because the bricks above were already set.
Every day the young son would look at the wall, frustrated and unhappy because he always focused on the four crooked bricks. He became so frustrated and unhappy, that he contemplated tearing down the wall so he could rebuild it - thus, in his mind, making it perfect.
One day his father approached and complimented him on what a wonderful job he had done, and how beautiful the wall was. The son, instead of being grateful, responded "Beautiful? Look at those four bricks - they are so crooked they ruin the wall."
The father considered this, and said "I see the four crooked bricks. But I also see another thousand perfect bricks, and the wall is beautiful."
The son became aware that he was so focused on the crooked bricks, and his desire to make everything "perfect", that he didn't see the beauty of the wall he had built.
The question (actually, it's three questions):
Where is your focus, what are you judging, and how is it affecting your happiness?
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Have you ever stopped to admire a flower? There are several lessons you can learn from it – first, be present (covered in Thursday’s post). Second, drop your expectations. Does the flower stop blooming if no one notices? No, it expects nothing in return. Likewise, you should “do” without expectation of anything in return. Be compassionate. Help others. Show gratitude. How others respond, or don't respond, should not affect the nature of your actions. You should not need anyone to notice or thank you for what you do, and if you have expectations that they should, your actions aren’t selfless.
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Thought for the weekend:
"An athlete may run ten thousand miles in order to prepare for one hundred yards. Quantity gives experience." - Ray Bradbury
This quote is powerful, but even more so if you apply it to personal growth as opposed to your career, a hobby, or a sport/activity. How much time do you really spend on yourself? Compare that to the time you spend on things like television, movies, hobbies, sports, etc. There is nothing wrong with any of those activities if you enjoy them, but don't let them be a distraction from life. Spend time on "you" - self-introspection, understanding, growth of positive attributes like gratitude and compassion, developing the ability to see the similarities in your fellow man as opposed to the differences.
In 20 years you won't remember many of the distractions you get lost in day-to-day; there will just be a sense of "where did the time go?" But, you WILL remember and reap the benefits of persistent "practice" when it comes to your own growth and development.
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what is t.a.d.?
